Baked Falafel

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Like, please explain how I can leave for work looking like a perfect 10 & by the time 5 p.m. rolls around I look like a literal troll.

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What are the physics behind this phenomenon? How can so much damage be done in 8 short hours?

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I went to the bathroom before I left work & almost didn’t recognize myself. My hair was greasy (washed it the night before), my mascara was running down my cheeks like I’ve been sobbing at e-mails all day, & my clothes look like they’ve never met an iron. You are a PROFESSIONAL, Rachel – get it together!

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I always think it’s going to be different, too. Like, I’ll have a really cute day & I just KNOW that it will be the one I will stay hella adorable. NOPE – still a 5 p.m. troll just looking for a bridge to guard. I just want to put a shawl on my head & run to the car, honestly.

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I get home & even Topanga looks at me in disgust. Then I feed her falafel crumbs & she pretends to think I’m pretty.



Time: 50 minutes | Serves: 20-25 falafel (depending on how big you make them)


  • 2 cans of chickpeas
  • 1 onion, chopped
  • 1/4 cup of cilantro, chopped
  • 2 tbsp. of parsley, chopped
  • 4 cloves of garlic
  • 1 tbsp. of all-purpose flour
  • 2 tbsp. of parmesan cheese, grated
  • 1 tbsp. of lemon juice
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of paprika
  • 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • Pita bread, for serving
  • 1 cup of non-fat greek yogurt
  • 2 tsp. of lemon juice

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • In a food processor, combine chickpeas + onion + cilantro + parsley + garlic + flour + cheese + lemon juice + cumin + paprika + crushed red pepper + S+P
  • Process on low + slowly add olive oil
  • Form into small balls + place on parchment paper-lined baking sheets
  • Bake for 25 minutes
  • In a small bowl, combine greek yogurt + 2 tsp. of lemon juice + S+P
  • Stuff 3-4 falafel in some pita + drizzle the yogurt on top
  • Race your husband to see who can eat the most in the shortest time span



14 thoughts on “Baked Falafel

  1. alyssa breed says:

    Omg this is so funny and also so my life. Hair washing the night before leads to SO many hair regrets by the end of the next day… Also makeup ON POINT, doesn’t matter, smudged and/or no longer visible by the end of the day. The struggle is truly truly real.


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