I’ve held my tongue all season, but I can hold my tongue no longer!
That was the most predictable finale in the history of the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise.
I can say this because I am a certified Bach expert and I would beat all of you in a Bachelor quiz.
I can also say this because I read spoilers and knew exactly what was going to happen. I’m sorry, I don’t understand how people can just ~not~ read them when they are available. It’s like not shaking the Christmas presents that are under the tree. I gotta get a feel for what I’m about to get myself into, ya dig? Anyways, I do this before every season so I can watch the love story unfold. There are typically like 1-2 surprises, though. Like, my spoiler source can’t know every detail, right? WRONG. He hit the nail on the head every daggum time. Not a twist or a turn in the whole kit and caboodle.
Honestly, in this moment, I’m not sure I’ve ever trusted anyone more than my spoiler source.
Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4
- 4 ears of corn, shucked
- 1 onion, chopped
- 2 stalks of celery, chopped
- 1 red pepper, chopped
- 1 zucchini, chopped
- 2 medium potatoes, diced (I used a red + a white)
- 3 tbsp. of all-purpose flour
- 1 cup of almond milk
- 3 cups of vegetable stock
- 1 tsp. of celery salt
- 1 tsp. of garlic powder
- 1 tsp. of paprika
- 1/2 tsp. of dried parsley
- S+P, to taste
- 1 tbsp. of olive oil
- Cilantro, for serving
- Crusty bread, for serving
- Heat olive oil in a stock pot over medium heat
- Add onion + S+P, cook for 3 minutes
- Add celery + cook for another 3 minutes
- Add red pepper + zucchini + S+P, cook another 3-4 minutes
- Add potato + S+P, cook for a minute
- Stir in flour, cook for a minute
- Add almond milk + vegetable broth + celery salt + garlic powder + paprika + parsley + S+P
- Bring to a boil
- Reduce to simmer, cover + cook for 16-18 minutes or until potatoes are tender
- Add corn, cook another 10 minutes
- Turn off the heat
- Using an immersion blender (or transfer 1/2 of the soup to a blender), blend the soup together until creamy + smooth to your desire (Use adult supervision for this step if necessary)
- Serve warm topped with cilantro + some crusty bread
- Unhinge jaw + pour warm contents directly down gullet
Adapted from here: