Apparently, I’m going to have to take over ALL of the household chores.

I give the man such simple tasks. He does outside, I do inside. Meaning, he has to keep a pair of cars clean and the garage tidy. That’s it!

Living in a townhouse, we have peeps that do our yard, so like the man’s chore time is truly minimal. Living in a townhouse also means we have communal trash receptacles. His most important job is to simply take the trash to said receptacles. Simple, right?

We didn’t drive my car during the entire hurricane because it’s basically a Tonka truck and might get swept away in heavy winds. After the storm, I hop in to run some errands. I’m instantly hit what a stench reminiscent of putrid animal flesh. I look all around this car and find nothing. I pump up the air, roll down the windows and continue on my journey, gagging constantly. At one point, I convinced myself the animal was actually still alive and going to crawl on me any second and, while I don’t eat animals, I also don’t love being near them. By the time I get home, I’m thoroughly disturbed. “GARRETT! GARRETT! Something has died in my car!!!!!!” He goes to check it out and comes back in with these sad puppy dog eyes. “I did something bad………….I left a bag of trash in your trunk….for probably a week.”

BEST BELIEVE your girl will not be letting this one go for a minimum of 13 weeks!

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 8-10 fritters

Ingredients:

• 1 can of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
• 2 corn on the cob, grilled or roasted + shucked, or 1 can of roasted corn, drained
• 1 zucchini, shredded with a cheese grater
• 1/2 a white onion, diced
• 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
• 2 tbsp. of nutritional yeast
• 1/4 cup of flax meal
• 1/2 cup of whole wheat flour
• 1 tsp. of cumin
• 1 tsp. of paprika
• 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
• S+P, to taste
• 2-3 tbsp. of olive oil

How to:

• In a bowl, mash the chickpeas
• Add all other ingredients minus the olive oil, mix well
• Refrigerate about 20 minutes or so
• Heat olive oil over medium heat in a cast iron skillet
• Form lil patties + cook no more than 4 at a time for about 2-3 minutes on each side
• Remove + repeat with remaining patties
• Serve hot with some sprouts + a lil salad
• When feeling angry at your sweetie, use a lil fritter as a punching bag + eat the crumblies off your knuckles