How can I continue wearing the Hostess with the Mostest crown in good conscience when I suck at entertaining?

My dad came to visit for my 28th birthday.

I don’t want a single Happy Birthday message from a one of ya, I mean it! We’re not acknowledging it.

I was so pumped for his visit. I couldn’t wait to just do all of the fun things with him. It wasn’t until I picked him up from the airport that I realized I had forgotten to plan literally anything for us to do. Like, not a THING on the agenda to entertain this man. After a quick panic attack, we talk about the possibilities over dinner and decide to just hang loose. Just kick back, hang and relax. And when all else fails, I pride myself on choosing excellent dining locales. So I didn’t plan any exciting outings, I can book a dinner reservation like a grand champion! We’re both feeling good about the next few days when our gyoza appetizer is served. Undercooked and untasty (not a word, but appropriate). An omen, if you will, for what would be the worst meals I ever forced a loved one to eat. It was horrendous. All my favorite local spots disappointed. Soggy shrimps, dry pork shanks, taste-less beef burritos – all of this was his, obviously. I had to take the man to dessert every night just to make up for it. I try to limit his sweets intake, but I had to go against my principles just to keep him nourished!

He politely told me he would only be back if we dined exclusively at chain restaurants he was confident in.

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

• 1 1/4 cups of all-purpose flour
• 2 tsp. of baking powder
• 1/4 cup of green onions, chopped
• 2 tbsp. of chives, chopped
• 1/2 tsp. of cumin
• 1/2 tsp. of turmeric
• 1 1/2 cups of unsweetened dairy free milk
• 1/2 a tomato, diced
• 4 cloves of garlic
• 1 cup of plain almond milk yogurt
• 5 tbsp. of olive oil
• S+P, to taste

How to:

• Preheat oven to 400 degrees
• Place garlic cloves on a square of foil, drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + wrap up in the foil
• Roast for 20-25 minutes
• Once cooled, combine garlic + yogurt + 1 tbsp. of olive oil + S+P in a lil food processor + pulse until smooth
• Refrigerate until ready to serve
• Meanwhile, whisk together flour + baking powder + cumin + turmeric + herbs + S+P
• Make a well in the center, add milk + 2 tbsp. of olive oil + tomato, combine well
• Add remaining olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
• Scoop 1/2 cup of batter into the skillet + cook for about 3 minutes or until bubbles start to form, flip + cook another 3 minutes
• Repeat with remaining batter
• Serve warm with garlic whip
• Gather pals + take to a park + play ultimate savory pancake, winner eats all

Adapted from here!