Green Goddess Veggie Bowl

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The manager of a Memphis-area Target is trying to kill me.

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Here is my hypothesis: Target hires a new manager. He/she starts on day one and is asked to share his phone number with his employees. He obliges. His phone number is in the hands of dozens, maybe a hundred Target employees.

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The kicker: he gave them MY phone number.

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For the past three days I have had approximately 11 Target employees call me to tell me why they will either be late to work or why they can’t come in. One young woman called me in a panic, assuring me her uniform was on and she was leaving a Wal-Mart to head to work. I know these details because even after telling her 6 times she had the wrong number, she continued to speak.

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If she calls me back, I’m firing her for supporting the competition.

 

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4 bowls

Ingredients:

  • 1 bunch of asparagus, washed + ends trimmed
  • 1 bunch of broccolini, washed + ends trimmed
  • 1/2 lb. of brussels sprouts, peeled + halved
  • 1 head of cauliflower, washed + cut in florets
  • 1 package of frozen edamame, cooked to package directions
  • 1 avocado
  • 2 tbsp. of cilantro, chopped
  • Juice of 1/2 a lime
  • 4 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 tbsp. of white vinegar
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 425 degrees
  • Arrange asparagus on a lined baking sheet, drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + S+P
  • On another lined baking sheet, arrange broccolini + brussels sprout, drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + S+P
  • On a third lined baking sheet, arrange cauliflower, drizzle with one tbsp. of olive oil + S+P
  • Place these in the oven together with asparagus on top, then broccolini + brussels sprouts, finally cauliflower
  • Roast asparagus for 15 minutes, remove
  • Roast broccolini + brussels sprouts for 20, remove
  • Roast cauliflower for 25, remove
  • Meanwhile, combine 1/2 of an avocado + lime juice + cilantro + remaining olive oil + S+P, mix well
  • Bring a pot of water with the vinegar to a slow boil
  • Crack an egg into a lil ramekin
  • Make a lil whirlpool in the water + drop the egg gently in the center
  • Poach for 3 minutes, remove with a slotted spoon onto a paper towel lined plate
  • Repeat with remaining eggs
  • To make a bowl, combine some asparagus + some broccolini + some sprouts + some cauliflower + some avocado slices + some edamame + some of the avocado dressing + a poached egg + S+P
  • Repeat with remaining ingredients
  • Serve hot
  • Might want a knife to help cut broccolini + asaparagus, meaning a plate would be easier, but research shows eating out of a bowl makes you happier so suck it up + eat out of the bowl

Roasted Asparagus Grilled Cheese

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I took public transit and didn’t die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Taking the bus was a thrill! I felt like an independent city girl or a common plebian or something.

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What misconceptions I had about this mode of transportation!

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First, I thought they were unsafe. I had this notion that busses just ~flip~ over on the regular. This is false, apparently. Second, I thought they were dirty. It was clean AND I had a personal vent and reading light. Cute! Finally, I thought there were just too many variables for my feeble mind to comprehend. How do I pay? How do we file in? Are there assigned seats? What if the bus driver kidnaps me and takes me to his lair?

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The bus driver did have to show me how to insert the coins, so once he figured out I was an idiot he decided to let me go.

 

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4 sandwiches

Ingredients:

  • 1 bundle of asparagus, washed + trimmed
  • 1 avocado, pitted
  • 8 slices of swiss cheese
  • 1 cup of gorgonzola
  • 1 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • Butter
  • 8 slices of sourdough
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 425 degrees
  • Arrange asparagus on a lined baking sheet, drizzle with olive oil + S+P
  • Roast for 13 minutes
  • Meanwhile, smash avocado in a bowl + stir in red pepper + S+P
  • Once cooled, cut asparagus in half
  • On two pieces of bread, spread some avocado on one side + butter on the other
  • On the avocado side, add a piece of swiss + asparagus + gorgonzola + another piece of swiss + top with the other piece of bread, avocado side down, repeat
  • Heat olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Grill sandwich for 3 minutes, flip + grill another 2 minutes
  • Serve hot
  • Get a big ole bowl of soup + dunk this bad boy like you aint never dunked before

Soyrizo Eggs Benedict

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Did I ever tell y’all that I almost played Lizzie McGuire?

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I was a very talented child actress.

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I mean, I did mostly hip, local community theatre, but I was also in an infomercial about Tourette’s once. I got paid $75 for that gig.

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Here’s how it went down:

It was closing night of this musical I was in. The theatre threw this huge party. A man in a skirt (I’m fuzzy on the details) comes up to me & my folks and says, “Your daughter is very talented. I’d like to be her agent.” I am all, “OMG, yes, I am a STAR & I will not let you down!!!” & my parents are all, “That’s sweet but we move to Tennessee next week – see ya!”

I kicked and screamed and rolled around on the stage in my party dress to prove a point.

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All to say, I told all of my new friends in TN that I was almost on the Disney channel.

 

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 bundle of asparagus, rinsed + trimmed
  • 6-8 eggs
  • 12 oz. of soyrizo
  • 4 whole wheat english muffins
  • 1 cup of plain greek yogurt
  • 2 chipotle chilis in adobo, minced
  • 2 tbsp. of adobo sauce
  • Juice of 1 a lime
  • 1 tbsp. of honey
  • 3 avocados
  • 1/4 cup of sun-dried tomatoes
  • 1 jalapeno, diced
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tbsp. of white vinegar
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 2 tbsp. of cilantro, chopped + more for serving
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Arrange asparagus on a lined baking sheet + drizzle with olive oil + S+P
  • Bake for 20 minutes
  • Meanwhile, combine yogurt + chilis + adobo sauce + 1/2 of the lime juice + honey + S+P, set aside
  • In another bowl, mash avocadoes + add sun-dried tomatoes + jalapeno + the rest of the lime juice + cilantro + cumin + S+P, set in the refrigerator
  • Heat a skillet over medium heat
  • Squeeze soyrizo out of the casings + into the skillet
  • Cook until browned, 6-8 minutes
  • Bring a pot of water to a simmer
  • Add a pinch of salt + the vinegar
  • Using a spoon, create a lil whirlpool in the simmering water
  • Slowly pour the cracked egg into the water
  • Cook for 3 minutes
  • To assemble, spread some of the guacamole over a toasted muffin + top with asparagus + soyrizo + a poached egg + drizzle the hollandaise
  • Sprinkle with remaining cilantro + serve hot
  • Smash face directly onto plate + never come back up for air it is unnecessary

 

Adapted from here: http://www.halfbakedharvest.com/cotija-guacamole-chorizo-eggs-benedict-honey-chipotle-lime-sauce/