Cauliflower Po’Boy

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I saw humans IN PERSON this weekend!

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After 29 years of extreme introversion, who knew I’d be so happy to leave the house?

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Don’t worry, I didn’t touch a soul & it was a small, trusted group at someone’s home.

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It just felt so nice to do something seemingly ~normal~. I love Garrett with my entire heart, but he is LITERALLY the only human being I’ve really seen in 2 months. It was nice to converse in person with others. The not hugging or getting too close thing was a little odd, but tbh I could get used to it. I’ll do whatever it takes for this virus to get gone & business to reopen! Idk about where y’all live, but NC has just barely begun to open up. Still no bars or dining in at restaurants which I’m grateful for, but it is nice to see the streets a bit busier. If only we could all just wear our masks, social distance & follow the daggum rules, we might actually get through this quarantine & not have to do it again after all!

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But my faith in mere mortals is lacking these days, so we’ll see.

 

 

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4 sandwiches

Ingredients:

  • 1 large head of cauliflower, cut into florets
  • 1 1/2 cups of all-purpose flour
  • 1 tsp. of garlic powder
  • 1 tsp. of onion powder
  • 1 tbsp. of cajun seasoning
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of paprika
  • 3/4 cup plain almond milk
  • 2 cups of panko breadcrumbs
  • 1 tbsp. of grainy mustard
  • 1 tsp. of sriracha
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • Tomato slices, for serving
  • Arugula, for serving
  • Toasted hoagies, for serving

 

How to:

  • In a large bowl, combine flour + garlic + onion powder + cajun seasoning + cumin + paprika + S+P
  • Add in milk + 3/4 cup of water, combine until formed into a batter
  • In another bowl, add bread crumbs
  • Dredge cauliflower florets in batter, then bread crumbs + place in air fryer basket in an even layer (might have to do two rounds of frying)
  • Air fry for 20 minutes, flipping once
  • Meanwhile, combine mustard + sriracha + juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • To serve, spread your mustard mix on both sides of a hoagie, add tomato slices + cauliflower + arugula + drizzle with some of the remaining lemon juice
  • Serve hot
  • Squeeze the bread together to kind of mush everything together + unhinge your jaw + go to town

 

 

Adapted from here!

Veggie Tortas

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You know quarantine is getting to you when you’re really excited to PACK!!!!

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While we still don’t know when we’ll be allowed to move, we’re just trying to prepare.

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There’s a very real possibility these bans will lift one day and we’ll be expected to get the heck out the next.

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So packing here we come! Really it’s Garrett doing the work. He woke up this morning and was like, “I think I could probably pack the entire house today!!!” I politely told him I’m not living around a bunch of moving boxes for potentially months so he needs to slow his roll. Did he listen? Absolutely not. This man made not one but TWO runs for packing supplies today because he went through his first round of items so quickly. I’ve never seen the man so motivated and jazzed about a project. However, he did require supervision because he tried to throw away multiple items he claimed I never use but that are very important like my clothes steamer!!!

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The true test of our marriage will be whether we can continue surviving solitary confinement together & a cross country move.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4 sandwiches

Ingredients:

  • 1 red pepper, sliced thin
  • 1 red onion, sliced thin
  • 1-2 zucchinis, halved
  • 1 can of black beans, rinsed + drained
  • 3-4 kaiser rolls or crusty bread
  • 3 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of chili powder
  • 1 tsp. of smoked paprika
  • S+P, to taste
  • Sriracha

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400
  • Arrange zucchini + red pepper on a lined baking sheet, drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P
  • Bake for 20 minutes, tossing once
  • Meanwhile, heat another tbsp. of olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Add onion + S+P, cook 6-7 minutes until caramelized, set aside
  • Meanwhile, add beans to a pot over low-med heat + add cumin + chili powder + smoked paprika + S+P, smush em up a bit
  • Add remaining olive oil to skillet
  • To assemble sammies, spread some sriracha on the inside of bans + add beans + veggies + smush breads together + grill on each side for 2 minutes, repeat
  • Serve hot
  • Tuck yourself gently in between the warm bread slices + take a snooze

 

 

Blueberry Swirl Bread

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I have…run out of things to talk about….

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I usually have a funny or at least borderline entertaining anecdote to share after the weekend.

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But when you do the same thing four weekends in a row, it all starts to blur.

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I finished a puzzle. We watched Ozark. I’m reading a book. Sometimes I nap. It’s getting wild up in here, is what I’m trying to say. I really just feel like a worthless bump on a leg, quite honestly. I’d prefer to feel a little more useful while in quarantine but I have no skills. I can’t sew masks for hospital workers, I can’t provide any services to those in need. What am I good for, seriously? Do you all know of any way I can contribute to society from the comforts of my home? I need to do SOMETHING.

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I can’t keep making bread, I’m going to actually explode.

 

 

Time: 3 hours (prep + baking) | Serves: 1 loaf

Ingredients:

  • 2/3 cup of plain almond milk
  • 6 3/4 tsp. of active dry yeast
  • 1/4 cup of coconut sugar
  • 3 cups of all purpose flour
  • 1/2 tsp. of S
  • 5 tbsp. of vegan butter, softened
  • 1/2 cup of blueberry jam

How to:

  • Warm the milk in a sauce pan to 98.6-113 degrees
  • Turn off heat, stir in yeast + 1 tbsp. of sugar, let activate for 10 minutes
  • Meanwhile, combine flour + remaining sugar + S in a bowl
  • Stir in yeast mixture + softened butter
  • Mix with your hands until combined + knead for 8-10 minutes or until a dough forms
  • Place dough in a large greased bowl, cover with a dish towel + let rise for an hour
  • Place on a lightly floured surface + knead for a while longer until air is out
  • Roll out the dough to a rectangle
  • Spread with blueberry jam
  • Roll up the dough taco style (long ways)
  • Transfer to a greased baking dish
  • Obvio, it won’t fit like this, so just smash it all around, folding the dough in on top of itself, this is gonna give you your swirls
  • Cover with a dish towel + let rest another 45 minutes
  • Meanwhile, preheat oven to 355
  • Brush loaf with a lil more milk
  • Bake for 40 minutes
  • Let cool for 10 minutes before removing from pan to cool more
  • Serve warm or room temp
  • Slather a slice with a lil vegan butter + slap on face, repeat with remaining slices until totally covered in bread

 

Adapted from here!