Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread

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Favorite places on Earth in order: 1) Airports 2) Trader Joe’s

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That’s it. That’s the whole list.

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Those are the places I am the most at home, the best version of myself, really.

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Because my local TJ’s is legit over an hour away, I adopt the PPPPP motto. Prior planning prevents poor performance. There is no room for error on these trips. A list is non-negotiable. It’s impossible to walk into that heavenly establishment without impulse buying, but you have to set some ground rules. Only one unnecessary purchase from each aisle – two from the frozen food aisle that’s lined with the cookies and sweet treats. Because it’s so far, I can only make it on weekends, meaning the joint is jumping. Peeps are packed in their like sardines! Comfortable shoes are a must. Keep your head down and your elbows slightly bowed – you might have to throw a couple if you and some gal are both reaching for the last cauliflower gnocchi. When shopping with pals, consider sharing a cart – this cuts down on the space you and your posse take up. It also makes you all look like a couple of radical broads on a mission cause you’re carrying a lot of stuff in your arms trying to catch up with your rogue cart as your friend beelines to the cheese.

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Do consider tipping your checkout guy if you share a cart because you will inevitably aggravate the stew out of him as you all divvy up your goodies.

 

 

Time: 1 1/2 hours (prep + cooking) | Seves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 2 cups of whole wheat flour
  • 1/2 cup of pure cane sugar
  • 1/2 cup of brown sugar
  • 3 tsp. of baking powder
  • 2 zucchini, washed + shredded
  • 1 cup of vegan chocolate chips
  • 1 ripe banana, mashed
  • 1/2 cup of favie non-dairy milk
  • 1/4 cup of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 1 tbsp. of flax seed
  • 1 tsp. of cinnamon
  • 1/2 tsp. of nutmeg
  • Pinch of S

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 350
  • Prepare a flax egg by combining flax seed + 3 tbsp. of hot water, stir + set aside
  • In a large mixing bowl, combine flour + sugars + baking powder + cinnamon + nutmeg + S, mix well
  • Add zucchini + banana + milk + olive oil + vanilla + flax egg, mix well
  • Fold in chocolate chips
  • Line a loaf pan with parchment paper + spray with some nonstick spray
  • Pour batter into pan + spread in an even layer
  • Bake one hour or until a toothpick comes out clean
  • Let cool for a bit
  • Serve warm, cold, room temp, for breakfast, lunch dinner, snack, I don’t care just eat it and if you don’t feel instantly happier, I’ll give you your money back, no I won’t

 

Adapted from here!

Copycat Panera Bread – Modern Greek Salad

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Why, oh why, was I not born in the early 1800s to a wealthy English family?!

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I think I could have really excelled.

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But only if I had money. I wouldn’t survive if I had to slum it.

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I went to a tea parlour this weekend with some girlfriends. My gosh, it was posh. This darling old lady waited on us wearing the most gorgeous apron I’ve ever seen. The whole place was decorated with these ornate paintings of British aristocrats. My people! We each had a pot of tea, served to us in these adorable tea pot coozies. Who knew such a happy thing existed in this world? Floral tea pot coozies! We ate scones and little biscuits (British for cookies, you wouldn’t understand) and just gabbed and sipped. In that moment, I felt I had truly found my calling. I am meant to be surrounded by beautiful things and delicate floral patterns and fine china and adorable little sugar cubes with equally adorable miniature sugar cube tongs. I now know I need at least three hours a day in the early afternoon for my tea time. Unfortunately, this is unacceptable in our heinous, overworked society.

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I feel like the Bronte sisters are probably the only ones who get me.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4

Ingredients:

  • 2-3 cups of kale, washed
  • 2-3 cups of romaine lettuce, washed + shredded
  • 1/2 cup of kalamata olives, halved
  • 1/2 cup of slivered almonds, toasted
  • 1 english cucumber, quartered
  • 2 cups of dry quinoa
  • 1 onion, diced
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 15 oz. can of crushed tomatoes
  • 1 tsp. of italian seasoning
  • 1 tsp. of paprika
  • 2 tbsp. of white wine vinegar
  • 1 tsp. of oregano
  • Juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • S+P, to taste
  • 6 tbsp. of olive oil

How to:

  • Cook the quinoa according to package directions, drain excess water
  • Heat 1 tbsp. of olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Add onion + S+P, cook for 4-5 minutes
  • Add garlic, cook another minute
  • Add crushed tomatoes + italian seasoning + paprika + S+P
  • Bring to a boil, reduce heat + simmer for 15 minutes
  • Stir in quinoa + some S+P
  • To make the dressing, whisk remaining olive oil with vinegar + oregano + lemon juice + some S+P
  • To serve, combine kale + romaine + cucumber + olives + toasted almonds + quinoa sofrito + drizzle with dressing
  • Serve chilled

 

Adapted from here!

Peanut Butter + Pretzel Crepes

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So how can the government just be, like, ~shut down~?

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Don’t we elect these officials to govern?

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Isn’t that a little hard to do when the elected officials shut down the government…?

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Perhaps I’m simplifying things. I don’t know anything about politics. I don’t believe in them, as a rule. I just wonder what our representatives are doing up there in DC this last, I don’t know, month or so? I imagine them roping off little sections of the Capitol for various game stations. There’s obviously a poker table with a professional dealer and  those little see through poker visors. Then there are your classics – Monopoly, Scrabble, Operation, etc. For those inclined to keep the mind agile during the shutdown, there are puzzles and crosswords, too. For our more active ladies and gents, there’s a couple of Twister mats and Bop-Its. They’ve gotta pass the time somehow.

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Honestly, I wonder if they could use some of the funds they’re saving not paying federal employees and pay to live stream this thing.

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4

Ingredients:

  • 1 1/2 cups of whole wheat flour
  • 3 tbsp. of brown sugar
  • 1 tsp. of baking powder
  • 2 cups of flax milk
  • 1 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 6 tbsp. of peanut butter
  • 1 cup of pretzels, crumbled
  • 1 pint of raspberries, rinsed
  • 1 tbsp. of lemon juice
  • 1 tbsp. of pure cane sugar

How to:

  • In a bowl, combine flour + brown sugar + baking powder + milk + extract + olive oil, mix well
  • Heat a large skillet sprayed with nonstick oil over medium heat
  • Meanwhile, combine raspberries + lemon juice + sugar + 2 tbsp. of water in a sauce pan, bring to a boil, reduce + simmer for a few minutes, remove from heat
  • Strain raspberry sauce if you don’t want seeds, but it won’t be as thick that way
  • Add 1/4 to 1/2 cup of batter at a time, spreading it in a thin, layer all around the bottom of the pan, cook 2-3 minutes, flip + cook another 2 minutes, remove + repeat with batter
  • To serve, spread 1 tbsp. of peanut butter on one half of the crepe + top with a handful of pretzel crumbles + top with a lil raspberry drizzle, roll up + top with more raspberry drizzle, serve warm, room temp or cold
  • Grab a couple of these handheld babies + do the hokey pokey all around the kitchen

 

Crepe batter from here!