Chocolate Crinkle Cookies

This Christmas season has been one of the most shocking of my life.

Not only did I get the fewest presents I have ever received (but who is counting or complaining),

But I discovered this seemingly universal trend that I am not on board with.

Santa doesn’t wrap presents?????? What kind of absolute malarkey is this? Apparently, he doesn’t have “time” or something, I don’t really know, I tuned out. I just can’t get behind this. Santa ALWAYS wrapped my presents. I’m not saying he did this himself, those elves of his certainly had a hand. & you know Mrs. Claus spends the entire year preparing bows & what not. I just cannot stand seeing photos of people’s Christmas mornings and there are all of these gifts just under the tree all willy nilly! Naked gifts! That’s fewer gifts to unwrap which is literally the most fun part. I’m not budging on this.

My Santa also did little gift tags on my presents that said “to: Rachel from: Santa” & while it is suspicious Santa & my mother had the same handwriting, I respect how well put together the wrappings were.

Time: 45 minutes (prep + baking) | Serves: 12-16 cookies

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup of cane sugar
  • 1/3 cup of olive oil
  • 1/3 cup of almond milk
  • 1 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 1 1/4 cups of whole wheat flour
  • 1/2 cup of cocoa powder
  • 1 tsp. of baking powder
  • Pinch of S
  • Powdered sugar, for rolling

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 350
  • In a bowl, combine sugar + oil
  • Add milk + vanilla, stir to combine
  • Add flour + cocoa powder + baking powder + S + combine
  • Using a cookie scoop, scoop some dough + rub in powdered sugar, place on lined baking sheet (I used baking mats), repeat
  • Bake for 10 minutes, remove from the oven + let sit on the hot sheet pan a couple more minutes
  • After a few minutes to let them firm up, transfer to a wire rack to cool
  • Calories don’t count in 2021 anymore, eat them all!!!!!

Adapted from here!

Spiced Chocolate Chip Cookies

Now whenever I see cookies, I’m forced to sing:

“Cookies! Cookies! Cookies are so yummy! Fresh out of the oven and into my tummy!”

Oh, you’re not familiar with that tune? Allow me to mail you this singing bear that plays a medley of tunes on repeat, cookie song included.

Because they are the only songs I know. I couldn’t tell you what’s popular in real music right now. I was like 8 months late to the Olivia Rodrigo party. We are a big Disney Junior household right now. She obviously has no idea what’s going on in the shows, but she loves the music. Bluey is this really cute show about Australian doggos and for the longest time she was uninterested, but recently she realized the theme song SLAPS. So that’s been a highlight of this season of life for me. Nothing, however, will ever trump Lou’s beloved Hotdog Song from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. When that song comes in, she stops whatever she is doing, races to the television and starts dancing her tuchus off. It’s incredibly cute.

But that song haunts my dreams and will be the reason her first real word is hotdog.

Time: 1 day (prep + baking) | Serves: 1.5 dozen cookies

Ingredients:

  • 2 cups of flour – I used 1 cup of all-purpose + 1 cup of whole wheat
  • 1 tsp. of baking powder
  • 1 tsp. of baking soda
  • 1 tsp. of nutmeg
  • 1 tsp. of ginger
  • 2 tsp. of cinnamon
  • 1/2 cup of brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup of coconut sugar
  • 2 tbsp. of honey or agave
  • 1/2 cup of olive oil
  • 1 cup of chocolate chips

How to:

  • In a bowl, whisk flour + baking powder + baking soda + nutmeg + ginger + cinnamon
  • In a separate bowl, whisk brown sugar + coconut sugar + honey + olive oil + 1/4 cup of water until smooth
  • Whisk in dry ingredients into your wet just until a little flour is left
  • Fold in the chocolate chips
  • Cover with plastic wrap + refrigerate overnight
  • Preheat oven to 350
  • Using a cookie scoop, scoop cookies onto a baking mat lined cookie sheet
  • Bake for 12 minutes
  • Serve warm or room temperature
  • Eat all of them before anyone gets home + pretend like you just bought a new cookie scented candle instead of baked all day

Spiced Poppyseed Shortbread Cookies

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I have a greatness hangover.

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From breathing the same air as Celine Dion two nights ago.

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Never again in the rest of my ever loving life will I ever be in the same room as someone better.

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Since I was 6 years old, this woman has been my literal everything. What she did, I did in the mirror 10x over until I had it JUST right. I about FAINTED when she used a mic with a cord the entire night. If you don’t think I learned to twirl a mic with a cord and catch it at just the right moment like Celine does, you are MISTAKEN. & her ARMS. The paparazzi make it seem like she’s too thin or something. I am here to tell you this woman is a BEAST. Her arms rival Michelle Obama’s, there I said it. So strong, so graceful, so much power! She was doing, like, lunges and backbends and let us remember she is 51. I cannot. Don’t even get me started on her performance of My Heart Will Go On. She came out of the darkness in a giant ball gown & the Titanic music was playing & I just sobbed and sobbed until I was exhausted & my mascara was everywhere.

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& I tried to convince the arena attendants our VIP passes meant we actually got to meet her and I went through three levels of people until I was told to please leave.

 

Time; 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2-3 dozen cookies

Ingredients:

  • 3/4 cup of all-purpose flour
  • 3/4 cup of whole wheat flour
  • 1/4 cup of chopped coconut, unsweetened
  • 2 tsp. of poppy seeds
  • 1 tsp. of nutmeg
  • 1 tsp. of ground ginger
  • 1/2 tsp. of baking powder
  • 1 cup of plant-based butter, softened
  • 3/4 cup of sugar
  • 2 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 3 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tbsp. of flax seed

How to:

  • In a small bowl, combine flax + 2.5 tbsp. of warm water, set aside
  • In a bowl, combine flours + coconut + poppy seeds + nutmeg + ginger + baking powder + a pinch of salt
  • In a mixer, combine butter + sugar until creamed together
  • Add vanilla + oil, beat on low
  • Once combined, add egg, + beat until combined
  • Slowly add in dry ingredients until everything is combined + it’s formed in a ball
  • Turn the bowl upside down on a large piece of parchment paper
  • Cover with another piece of parchment paper + roll into a thin rectangle, about 1/4 inch thick
  • Refrigerate for an hour
  • Preheat oven to 375
  • Remove the top parchment paper sheet + cut using a sharp knife into lil squares, placing on parchment paper lined cookie sheets
  • Bake 10-12 minutes
  • Remove + place cookies on a wire rack to cool
  • Eat 18 for an after dinner snack

 

 

Adapted from here!