Falafel Burgers


Never has my hair been worse.


First world problems, I know, but hang with me here.


I’d like to blame my broken locks on quarantine, but I always go 6+ months between trims because I like to let myself look as terrible as possible before doing something about it.


Apparently the dry Colorado weather is v helpful in breaking my ends – not that they needed much help. It’s also not holding a curl here so my super long, lanky, lifeless hair is doing wonders for my super long, lanky lifeless face. I have not had my hair done by anyone other than my usual Memphis gal in 10+ years. Minus the one time I tried to get it done in WA and the woman berated me for filling in my eyebrows vs. threading them. It was a treat, really. But I couldn’t wait until I go to Memphis next. & my what a pleasant experience it turned out to be! I forgot what a luxury it was to be shampooed by another. She was also brutally honest – “Umm I’m going to have to take a lot off…is that OK?” But nary a word about my brows & for that I am grateful!


She also suggested I stop wearing my hair up and I need to connect her with my 5th grade boyfriend who also suggested I stop doing that because he thought it looked ugly.



Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6


  • 1 1/2 cans of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
  • 1/2 a white onion, diced
  • 1/2 cup of parsley, chopped
  • 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1/2 cup of panko
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 1 tbsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of coriander
  • 1 tsp. of cayenne
  • S+P, to taste
  • Cucumber, for serving
  • Tomatoes, for serving
  • Lettuce, for serving
  • Avocado, for serving
  • Buns, for serving
  • Tzatziki, for serving

How to:

  • In a food processor, combine chickpeas + onion + parsley + garlic + panko + lemon juice + cumin + coriander + cayenne + S+P
  • Form into patties + place on a greased + lined baking sheet, freeze for a few minutes
  • Preheat oven to 375
  • Bake for 30-40 minutes, flipping once in between
  • To serve, place a patty on a bun + top with lettuce + tomato + cucumber + avocado + tzatziki
  • Plant your feet firmly + do a lil wriggle + grab the sammie with both of your grubby mitts + go to town

Falafel Platter


Our house is on the market.


Which I’d probably care about if we owned it, but alas.


However, I DO care that a whole host of strangers are traipsing through here and touching all of my things with their grubby paws.


The realtor was over recently taking some fresh pix. I had been gone the entire week and, while tidy, the house was not up to my unusually high standards. The realtor was like, “This place is definitely going to get offers. It helps that you live so ~clean~.” While I took a bow in my mind and thanked the Academy for this honor, I simultaneously started downplaying her compliment and assuring her I usually keep a much better home! Her words fueled me for days. UNTIL I realized she was likely just buttering me up for the chaos that was to ensue – that being the dozens of feet that would enter my home to judge my decorative choices and open my drawers. Felix (my Roomba) has truly been working overtime trying to clear all of the foreign particles from our carpet fibers.


Am only interested in spacious bubbles for our next home.



Time: 10-12 hours (overnight soaking + prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6


  • 2 cups of uncooked chickpeas, soaked overnight + drained + rinsed in the morning (used 1 1/2 cans of chickpeas if you don’t have time to soak fresh ones)
  • 1/3 cup of flat-leaf parsley, + more for serving
  • 4 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1/2 of an onion, diced
  • 2 tbsp. of flax meal (or your flour of choice
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 1 tbsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of coriander
  • 1 tsp. of cayenne pepper
  • 1 cup of white quinoa, cooked to package directions
  • 1 english cucumber, diced
  • 2 roma tomatoes, diced
  • 1 red pepper, sliced thin
  • Pita, for serving
  • 2-3 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1/2 cup of tahini
  • 1/2 tsp. of garlic powder
  • 1/4 cup of warm water
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Cook chickpeas according to package directions, drain + rinse
  • In a food processor, combine chickpeas + parsley + garlic + onion + flax meal + 1/2 of the lemon juice + cumin + coriander + cayenne + S+P, pulse until a pasty dough (gross) forms
  • Refrigerate for an hour
  • Meanwhile, combine quinoa + cucumber + tomatoes + remaining lemon juice + S+P, set aside
  • Meanwhile x2, combine tahini + garlic powder + S+P + the warm water in a lil bowl, adjust seasoning to taste
  • Heat 1 tbsp. of olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Form chilled falafel dough into lil balls using a cookie scoop
  • Fry in the skillet a couple at a time, turning on all sides + not letting burn!
  • To serve, arrange some quinoa on one side, then falafel, followed by some red pepper + pita with the tahini sauce on the side + extra parsley
  • Using only the contents of this platter, create mural, let dry + hang in prominent spot in home