Chili Lime Broccoli Steaks

fullsizeoutput_312

Pretty sure I live in an alternate universe.

fullsizeoutput_320

And/or a North Carolina suburb with really well-behaved, respectful children. Either or.

fullsizeoutput_321

Garrett & I were the kewl house on the block last night. Ya know, the kind that leave out the giant bowl full of name-brand candy with no passive aggressive sign saying to please only take two pieces.

fullsizeoutput_324

We’re jazzed, man. Some little kid is going to have the Halloween of his life because he can take this bowl and dump it directly into his pillow sack and brag to all his friends that he got 89 mini Snickers from the kewl couple down the street. Garr and I go out and enjoy an evening with pals. We get home prepared to find an empty bowl, maybe catch a glimpse of a stray toddler dressed as a little cowboy, I don’t know. The bowl is UNTOUCHED. Not a single grubby mitt has been placed upon these Skittles. How can this be? We left the light on and everything! The front porch was decorated with pumpkins and mums! Mums, I tell you!!!! It’s an inviting porch! I was devastated. Questioning every decision. The Starburst were too wild, weren’t they??

fullsizeoutput_31f

Now we are stuck with all of this candy and cannot decide whether to pitch it or throw it at passing cars.

 

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4 lil steaks

Ingredients:

  • 2 heads of broccoli, carefully halved
  • Juice of 1 lime
  • 2 tbsp. of chili powder
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1/2 tsp. of cayenne pepper
  • 1/2 tsp. of garlic powder
  • S+P, to taste
  • 1 tsp. of nutritional yeast
  • 1 shallot, sliced thin
  • 1 cup of cooked quinoa, for serving
  • Green onion, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 450 degrees
  • Arrange broccoli on lined baking sheet
  • Spray broccoli all over with cooking spray
  • Combine chili powder + cumin + cayenne pepper + garlic powder + S+P in a lil bowl
  • Rub all over the broccoli
  • Roast for 15 minutes
  • Flip steaks, roast another 10 minutes
  • Fresh out the oven, hit ’em with that lime juice + nutritional yeast
  • Serve hot with shallots + quinoa + green onion
  • Tell sweetie you’re having steaks for dinner, then serve him this + see if he still loves you

 

Red Beans + Coconut-Lime Rice

06DCE6D0-6560-4CAC-A449-14843092F076

Happy International Women’s Day, my comrades!

AFA989A0-FE47-4FB6-9519-9CEE816E031D

Honestly, I did not realize the other 364 days of the year are for men, but I will accept any and all excuses to celebrate myself!

D18E0FD2-6F1B-4E9A-8D98-2A58DB67B79A

I’d like to take the time to share some of the reasons females are the best:

DCABDBE0-D512-4AEE-9F85-7AA2EC2D1198

1) We are, like, incredibly empathetic 2) We drop everything and run to be with those we love when they need us 3) We are super duper resilient – like break our hearts, silly boys, and we will come out on the other end more goddess-like ever 4) We are the most beautiful, talented people in the whole world – i.e. Kate Winslet, Adele, my mom, my bff, etc. 5) We have a secret intuition that can sniff out BS accurately 98% of the time 6) We literally expel human life from our bodies.

B3CCB373-4CA7-423D-87AC-CE8D885D2399

7) We can go much longer without showering than men can.

 

 

Time: 2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

  • 2 cups of brown rice, rinsed + uncooked
  • 2 cups of cooked red beans (or two cans, but you should give fresh beans a try sometime!)
  • 1 mango, cut in cubes
  • 1 cup of coconut milk
  • 4 shallots, diced
  • 2 tbsp. of ground ginger
  • 1 lime
  • 1 tsp. of cayenne pepper
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste
  • Cilantro, for serving
  • Green onion, for serving
  • Toasted pepitas, for serving

How to:

  • Heat oil in a stock pot over medium heat
  • Add shallots + S+P, cook for 3-4 minutes
  • Add ginger + cook another minute
  • Add rice + stir to coat, toast for 2 minutes
  • Add coconut milk + 3 cups of water + cayenne pepper + S+P, bring to a simmer
  • Reduce heat, cover + cook for about 45 minutes or until the rice is tender and the liquid has absorbed
  • When tender, fold in beans + lime juice + lime zest + mango, cook another 4-5 minutes
  • Serve hot with cilantro + green onion + pepitas
  • Gift a bowl to a friend who is feeling under the weather because it has been proven by me that rice + beans cure 86% of maladies

 

Recipe adapted from Thug Kitchen!