Spring Pasta Salad

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I have the music in me.

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In that, it’s trapped inside of me & I can’t help but belt tunes at the top of my lungs at all hours of the day despite sharing walls with neighbors.

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So I’m channeling my energy into a new hobby: I am going to teach myself to play the guitar.

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Turns out it’s like really difficult. I was trying to learn some v basic chords the other day and thought I was going to break my fingers. I went to yoga the next morning and my left hand cramped so badly I almost collapsed. Is this normal? Anyways, I really suck. First, my guitar needs to be tuned. Having less than no experience, I do not know how to fix this on my own. I just keep twisting the knobby things and plucking and I stop when my ears stop bleeding. Second, I think I should chop off my fingernails??? They seem to inhibit me. Third, I need a kewl strap and a microphone stand so I can stand in front of the mirror and strum while performing for myself. This is all I really want to do tbh. Put on concerts for myself and keep the delusion alive that I am jam packed full of hidden talent and at any moment an agent will walk into my bedroom (if this happened, I should prob be concerned for my safety) and whisk me to Hollywood and I will grace the cover of a couple of major magazines and have a sitcom written around my life. I digress.

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If all else fails, I’ll just dramatically bust the guitar and crowd surf off the stage and into my imaginary audience.

 

 

Time: 30 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup of pasta
  • 1 can of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
  • 1 english cucumber, sliced thin
  • 6 mini sweet peppers, sliced thin
  • 8 mini multi-colored carrots, sliced thin
  • 3 radishes, peeled + sliced thin
  • 4 cups of arugula
  • 5 tbsp. of olive oil
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 1 tsp. of dijon mustard
  • 1 tsp. of agave
  • S+P, to taste
  • Hemp seeds, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Arrange chickpeas on a lined baking sheet, bake 15 minutes
  • Remove from oven + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P, bake another 15 minutes
  • Meanwhile, cook pasta to al dente, drain
  • Meanwhile, meanwhile, whisk together remaining olive oil + lemon juice + dijon + agave + S+P
  • To serve, combine arugula + pasta + chickpeas + cucumber + peppers + carrots + radishes + drizzle with vinaigrette
  • Serve chilled or room temp
  • Take a small broom + brush plate contents into mouth to avoid leaving any crumbs behind

 

Adapted from here!

Roasted Red Pepper + Broccoli Risotto

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Christmas tree is up, stockings are hung and a dozen holiday-scented candles are lit. Christmas time is here!

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I love how the holiday season reminds us of what’s really important.

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Like my uncanny resemblance to the Grinch.

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We relate on a really cerebral level, it’s just deep, man. Minus the anti-Christmas sentiments, we are practically twins. The secret language with our animals, the social anxiety, the love of raw onion, the motivation to publicly receive awards, it’s all there. Plus, I, too, have a standing 4 o’clock appointment to wallow in self-pity. I’m watching the movie now and he just said, “What if it’s a cruel prank? What if it’s a cash bar?” These are literally the only two things that cross my mind when I’ve been invited to a party or event.

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Also, I can do a near-perfect impersonation of the Grinch smile and it is a real crowd pleaser.

 

 

Time: 1 1/2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup of arborio rice
  • 1 white onion, diced
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1/4 cup of dry white wine
  • 6 cups of vegetable stock
  • 3 red peppers, tops lopped off
  • 2 heads of broccoli, cut in florets
  • 3 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste
  • 1/4 cup of nutritional yeast + more for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Arrange peppers on a lined baking sheet + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P
  • Arrange the broccoli florets on a lined baking sheet + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P
  • Roast veggies for 20 minutes, toss, roast another 10, remove broccoli, stir peppers again, cook until blackened on almost all sides
  • Meanwhile, heat remaining olive oil in a large stock pot over medium heat
  • Add onion + S+P, cook 3-4 minutes
  • Add garlic, cook another minute
  • Add rice, stir to coat + toast for a minute
  • Turn down heat to low-med, add wine, stir + let rice absorb
  • Add stock, one ladle at a time, stirring constantly until each ladle full is absorbed, repeat until rice is tender, about 40 minutes
  • Once peppers are cool, remove skin + chop peppers up
  • Once rice is tender, add roasted veggies + nutritional yeast + crushed red pepper + some S+P
  • Serve warm with some extra nutritional yeast
  • Roll up leftovers into lil balls + hang from your tree for a lil extra pizazz this Christmas

Caribbean Red Bean Soup

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I ruin everything I touch.

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At least all living things.

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Why did I think I could have house plants? Why? I’ve no experience with horticulture. I can barely keep myself alive.

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Everywhere I go, I see succulents and cacti. They are all the rage, as the kids like to say. For a while, I stuck with little fake ones. Joanna Gaines’ Target collection has been really inspirational to my living room. Somewhere along the way I got cocky. Fake succulents are kewl and all, but wouldn’t real ones really spice up this townhouse of ours? I dived in head first. I got a perfect little succulent and a yellow cactus man that looked similar to a prickly lollipop. I had this vision of creating a lil cactus oasis, so I planted them together in hopes they would be the best of friends and keep each other company. Apparently this is not OK? Dead within days. I even bought cactus soil! Next, I planted another succulent in an old candle holder. This one also died within days, but likely because I did not get out all of the candle wax due to my severe laziness?

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I asked Garrett what other things I ruin when I touch them and he said lives. Not untrue.

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

  • 2 cans of kidney beans, drained + rinsed
  • 1 white onion, diced
  • 1 medium carrot, chopped
  • 1 habanero pepper, diced
  • 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 2 tbsp. of ginger, minced
  • 2 cups of coconut milk
  • 1 can of diced tomatoes
  • Juice of 1/2 a lime
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1/2 tsp. of oregano
  • 1/2 tsp. of allspice
  • S+P, to taste
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • Green onion, for serving
  • Avocado, for serving

How to:

  • Heat oil in a stock pot over medium heat
  • Add onion + S+P, cook for 3-4 minutes
  • Add carrots + peppers, cook another 3 minutes
  • Add garlic + ginger + S+P< cook another 1-2 minutes
  • Add beans + coconut milk + tomatoes + lime juice + agave + oregano + allspice + S+P + about 2 cups of water, bring to a boil
  • Reduce heat, cook uncovered for 15-20 minutes, taste + adjust seasoning
  • Turn off heat + remove pot from heat
  • Using an immersion blender, blend up alllllll that goodness until smooth + creamy
  • Serve hot with green onion + avocado

 

Idea from here!