Avocado + Charred Corn White Pizza

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Want to know how to keep the romance alive in your marriage?

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I have some tried and true tips for you.

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When there is an overly commercialized holiday like Valentine’s Day, first things first. At the very last minute, get each other grocery store cards featuring lil animals. Accompany the card with some candy that the other person does not want and will inevitably take to work to share with colleagues.

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To fully celebrate the occasion, plan to do absolutely nothing. Less than nothing. Crawl into your hermit shells and hibernate, in fact. When you get hungry, make some homemade pizzas at like 3pm and eat them standing up at the kitchen counter. Then, go for a walk around town to work off the many carbs you just consumed. Come back home, put on your fugliest sweats and make the man watch Netflix original teen rom coms. Get in bed by 8pm – SHARP! Read a few chapters of your books. Lights out by 9pm.

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Keeping it spicy!

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 1 pizza

Ingredients:

  • 1 avocado, chopped
  • 1/2 cup of corn
  • 1/2 cup of cherry tomatoes, halved
  • Handful of spinach
  • 1/2 cup of fresh basil
  • 1 cup of cashews, soaked overnight
  • 1/4 cup of unsweetened, plain almond milk
  • 2 tbsp. of all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/2 tbsp. of nutritional yeast
  • Juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • 1 tsp. of garlic powder
  • 1 tsp. of onion powder
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste
  • Pizza crust of your liking (I used a cauli crust here!)

How to:

  • Pulse cashews in a food processor until nice + crumbly
  • Add milk + flour + nutritional yeast + lemon + garlic powder + onion powder + 1 tbsp. of olive oil + most of the basil, reserving a lil for topping, + S+P, process until smooth + creamy
  • Preheat oven to 425
  • In a cast-iron skillet, heat remaining olive oil over medium heat
  • Cook corn for a few minutes, charring + getting some color on those bad boys
  • Spread cashew cream on a crust + top with spinach + corn + tomatoes
  • Bake 13-15 minutes until your crust is done + your tomatoes + spinach or wilted
  • Remove + top with avocado + more basil, serve warm
  • Rub any leftover white sauce on your face + let it harden like a face mask, allowing the cashew nutrients to fully clog your pores

 

Sauce adapted from here!

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Eggplant Parm Pizza

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I am a zombie.

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I am walking around with glazed over eyeballs, ragged breaths and outstretched arms looking for my next victim.

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By victim, I mean plush object to cuddle and nap with for 23 hours.

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I just returned home from a long work conference where I had, on average, 4 hours of sleep each night. I am fully grown adult who needs at LEAST eight hours of beauty rest to even look and act like a human being. Nine is preferable – I find the extra hour adds just the faintest glow to my complexion. By the end of the week, I was struggling to form sentences and conceal the bags under my eyes. At one point, I was going down an escalator and saw some folks I needed to connect with coming up & I proceeded to practically bark at them….but also stutter?? Like, I tried to get my point across, but the combination of no sleep and the moving staircase I was on made it tricky. Another time, I found myself riding the escalator up, only to ride it back down immediately because I forgot something, and then do it all over again. The passersby found it amusing at least. I came home and fell asleep during yoga, so really doing well on fitness goals, too.

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Now why did I think it was a good idea to plan a vacation immediately after this requiring me to get up at 3:00am for a flight????

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2 pizzas

Ingredients:

  • 2 cauliflower crusts
  • 1 eggplant, peeled + sliced in 1/4 inch thick discs
  • 1 cup of tomato sauce
  • 1/2 cup of raw cashews, soaked overnight
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 2 tbsp. of unsweetened almond milk
  • 1/2 of a block of firm tofu, water drained
  • 1 tbsp. of ground flax seeds
  • 1/2 tbsp. of all-purpose flour
  • 1 cup of panko
  • 1 tsp. of italian seasoning
  • 1 tsp. of oregano
  • 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste
  • Olive oil spray
  • Basil, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Place eggplant rounds in a colander + sprinkle with salt, let drain for 20-30 minutes
  • Meanwhile, pulse cashews in food processor
  • Add lemon juice + tofu + S+P, process on high + slowly add in milk until smooth
  • Adjust seasoning to taste and place in fridge until ready to use
  • Meanwhile, combine flax seeds + 1/3 cup of water in a bowl, set aside for 10 minutes
  • Add panko + Italian seasoning + oregano + crushed red pepper + S+P to another bowl
  • Dredge eggplant disc in flax egg, then panko, place on a sprayed lined baking sheet, repeat with remaining dics
  • Bake 30 minutes, flipping once in the middle of cooking
  • Spread the crusts with tomato sauce + top with eggplant slices + tofu ricotta
  • Bake another 10 minutes
  • Serve warm with basil
  • Fold a slice like a lil pizza boat + swim it right down your cavernous gullet

 

Adapted from here!

Rainbow Carrot + Asparagus Tart

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How can I ever accurately express the impact Celine Dion has had on my life?

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I suppose I’d have to go back to the beginning. When a six-year-old Rachel sat in the movie theatre after her first screening of Titanic and the credits rolled. Something inside of me just clicked.

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My Heart Will Go On became the first in what would become a collection of ballads I would memorize and sing at all hours of the day staring at myself in the mirror performing in a melodramatic fashion.

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And now, in less than one year, I will see my idol in person. I will breathe her angelic air and hear her golden voice live. Because my mother knows me to my core, she was determined to get these tickets. She joined a Celine fan club to get early access to tickets and on the morning they went on sale, she was prepared to fight the masses with two cell phones, an iPad and a laptop. After we lost out on Adele tickets in 2016, she was not taking any chances! After about 73 failed attempts, she gets them. 8 tickets for me, her and 6 of my BFFs. It’s not until after she’s paid she realizes she accidentally bought us VIP tickets. Like, OK, do I smell a meet and greet in my future?!?!! After further research, we discover the 8 VIP tickets we purchased give us 8 commemorative lanyards and 1 CD. A single CD. For the 8 of us to share. We’ll be creating a rotation schedule so everyone gets equal amount of time with the disc.

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And we are also all going to channel different Celines for our wardrobe and makeup, so we or may not go viral.

 

 

Time:Β  1.5 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 1 tart

Ingredients:

  • 1 puff pastry
  • 4 rainbow carrots
  • 1/2 a bunch of asparagus
  • 1 cup of basil leaves
  • 1/2 cup of walnuts
  • 1/4 cup of nutritional yeast
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic
  • 1 tbsp. of lemon juice
  • 1/2 cup of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Thaw puff pastry for 40 minutes
  • Arrange carrots + asparagus on two lined baking sheets
  • Drizzle each with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P
  • Roast 20 minutes, tossing once in the middle, remove the asparagus, cook carrots a couple more minutes
  • Meanwhile combine basil + walnuts + nutritional yeast + garlic + lemon juice + S+P in a food processor, process on low + add in remaining olive oil
  • Spray a baking sheet with oil + place puff pastry on sheet
  • Spread pesto on thawed puff pastry, leaving edges plain
  • Cut carrots in half, length wise + place them + asparagus on top of the tart in whatever order your heart desires
  • Bake 15-20 minutes or until crisp to your desire
  • Cut in quarters + serve warm
  • Take a quarter in your hand + crunch it up over your tilted mouth letting the crumblies fill your pie hole