Fig Jam Pizza

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I wish I was 13 years old again and my greatest joy in life was learning a new cheat code in The Sims.

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I wasn’t a cool 13-year-old, OK?

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If I could calculate it, I’d likely discover I spent the better part of my adolescence behind a giant Dell computer screen making fictional families comprised of me, my school crushes and lots of children with my favorite names at the time – Juliet, Katarina, Trevor, etc.

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I’d build extravagant houses and paint all of the walls hot pink and lime green and fill the backyard with like 6 hot tubs. My character’s career path was ALWAYS music and I mastered the guitar in like 3 days and painted in my spare time. I always made my husband (better known as my 7th grade flavor of the week) a doctor and when, in real life, I decided I was totally over him and/or he got a girlfriend (more likely the case), I would make him cheat on me in the game so I could slap him and kick him out. Learning healthy relationship skills from the jump.

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The best was when I’d get bored with a family so I’d put them all in the house, remove the doors and watch them go nuts.

 

 

Time: 2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 1 pizza

Ingredients:

  • 2 lbs of figs, ends trimmed + sliced thin
  • 1 1/2 cup of sugar
  • 1/2 cup of lemon juice
  • 1 pizza crust
  • 2 cups of arugula
  • 1 onion, sliced thin
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • In a bowl, combine figs + sugar, coat + let sit for 15 minutes, stirring occassionally
  • Transfer figs to a pot + add lemon juice + 1 cup of water, bring to a boil
  • Turn heat down a bit, let simmer for 40-45 minutes, until jam is sticky + runny to your desire
  • If you want chunks, leave as is, if not, turn off heat + blend with an immersion blender
  • Transfer to a mason jar + refrigerate
  • Meanwhile, preheat oven to 400 + heat olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Add onion slice + S+P, let caramelize for 8-10 minutes, remove from pan
  • On a pizza crust, spread some jam + top with onion
  • Bake for 10 minutes or until crisp to your desire
  • Top with arugula + serve warm
  • Put a slice atop your head + run into the streets chanting “I gotta pizza on my head, but don’t call me a pizza head”

 

Fig jam adapted from here!

Taco Pizza

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Fitbits are equal parts motivating and gut-wrenching.

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I got one for Christmas in an attempt to be mindful of my activity (or lack thereof).

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Turns out my daily yoga session is only like 8 steps.

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What’s a girl gotta do to get her 10,000 steps?! I don’t run and it rains here. I’m meant to be indoors. I’ve really been trying to think outside of the box, though. Cleaning is actually a nice way to get some steps. My baseboards are shined up like pennies! I’ve also been practicing old dance moves. Turns out I’m still pretty terrible. I am, however, quite good at reading. Instead of cozying up with a good read, I just walk and read. All around the house. Garrett is moderately upset with this new hobby because, apparently, it’s distracting when I walk in front of him during his evening TV time.

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I think “Destined to be Sedentary” will be a chapter in my memoir.

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2 (or 1 if you’re me)

Ingredients:

  • 1 whole wheat crust
  • 1 package of soyrizo
  • 1 can of beans
  • 1 can of corn, drained
  • 1 jalapeno, diced + more for topping
  • 1 roma tomato, diced
  • 1 cup of butter lettuce, shredded
  • 1/4 cup of cilantro, chopped
  • 1/2 of an avocado, chopped
  • Tortilla chips
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of chili powder
  • S+P, to taste
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil

How to:

  • Prep dough according to package directions
  • Preheat oven to 450
  • Heat olive oil in a cast iron kitchen over medium heat
  • Add soyrizo, cook 4-5 minutes
  • Add jalapeno + corn, cook another 2-3 minutes, set aside
  • Meanwhile, add beans + juice to a small pot over low-medium heat
  • Add cumin + chili powder + S+P, cook 6-7 minutes
  • Spread beans on crust
  • Top with soyrizo mix
  • Bake 10 minutes
  • Top with lettuce + tomatoes + avocado + crumbled tortilla chips + cilantro
  • Serve hot
  • Fold pizza slice into shape of taco for some real Shutter Island business

 

Heirloom Tomato Tart

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My BFF spent 12 days in WA with me.

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Would your BFF fly across the country & spend 12 days with you because your husband is out playing in the woods for work? No, that’s the answer.

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Everyone was all, “Aren’t y’all going to get sick of each other?” And we were all, “Obvio, but we’ll just slap each other around a bit and get over it like normal people.”

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We did all of the things – went to all of the cities, ate all of the vegan food (& cheated on our diets a bit – PLS LOVE ME I’M ONLY HUMAN!!!), went on long walks, saw Coldplay in concert (v casual), ate more food, watched some sad TV, and ended the visit with a trip to Whole Foods because I am a really adventurous host. I offered to let her be my assistant/doggy nanny and told her she could live in the guest bedroom for a small rent & cleaning fee, but, sadly, she returned to Memphis.

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Luckily, we have matching shark tattoos to remember it all by.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 1 tart

Ingredients:

  • 10 sheets of phyllo dough, thawed
  • 1 lb. of heirloom tomatoes, washed + sliced thin
  • 1 shallot, sliced thin
  • 1 cup of basil, chiffonaded
  • 1/2 cup of breadcrumbs
  • 7 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, for taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 375
  • Brush a baking sheet with 1 tbsp. of  oil
  • Lay a sheet of phyllo dough + brush with 2 tsp. of olive oil + sprinkle with 1 tsp. of breadcrumbs
  • Top with another sheet of dough + repeat
  • Bake for 20-25 minutes or until golden + crisp to your desire
  • Meanwhile, heat remaining tbsp. of olive oil in a skillet over low-med heat
  • Add shallot + S+P, cook for 5-6 minutes
  • To serve, top warm dough with tomatoes + shallot + basil + some S+P
  • Cut it up + serve warm
  • Make a fist + punch your tart until it all crumbles into lil bits making it easier for you to vacuum up with your pie hole

 

Original idea from here!

http://www.foodandwine.com/recipes/giant-summer-tomato-tart