Chickpea Greek Salad

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It’s weird, like, I have all the time in the world right now.

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Yet less motivation than ever to make healthy choices.

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For a minute there, I was a real big workout guy. Lifting weights and exercising hardcore everyday. All before my work day began!

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Now my lazy behind is snoozing until 7. I’m lucky if I get up, ride the lil stationary bike and go for a quick walk around the ‘hood. I’m just really taking this time of rest to a new level. Let’s not get started on diet, either. I’ve basically dubbed myself the quarantine snack queen. I found a box of graham crackers in the back of the pantry and just destroyed them. I’m a bottomless trash panda. I think I’m letting myself go because I really don’t plan to interact with humans or take photos for the foreseeable future? It’s kind of nice not to be totally consumed with my appearance for a change, though! Or just my general health and wellness.

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I’m gonna fleek when my motivation returns right smack dab in the middle of bikini season.

 

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 can of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
  • 1 pint of cherry tomatoes, rinsed + drained + halved
  • 1 english cucumber, rinsed + quartered
  • 1/2 a red onion, diced
  • 1 yellow pepper, chopped
  • 1 red pepper, chopped
  • 1 green pepper, chopped
  • 1/2 cup of kalamata olives, halved
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 1 tsp. of garlic, minced
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400
  • Arrange chickpeas on a lined baking sheet + roast for 25 minutes, tossing once
  • Remove + sprinkle with S+P
  • Meanwhile, combine all veggies in a bowl + S+P
  • Stir in chickpeas
  • Meanwhile, combine olive oil + lemon juice + garlic + S+P
  • Drizzle over salad
  • Serve chilled
  • Use any leftovers as toppings on a pizza like a daggum PRO

 

Adapted from here!

Autumn Greek Salad

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Lately, my biggest fear and greatest hope are the same thing.

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Is that the opening verse of a pop song or what??? Call me, T. Swift.

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It’s true, though. It’s like I’m so terrified of this thing happening, but I also I kind of desperately want it to………….

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So I live in a townhouse and share a wall with neighbors on the left and the right. They are fine folk, kind, agreeable, all that. I work from home so I spend a lot of time inside said townhouse. While I work or do house chores or just generally live, I have music playing. The genres vary depending on my rapidly changing moods. I can go from top 40 to indie to Broadway to Christian to folk to emo jams I used to have as my MySpace songs all in a day’s work. No matter the genre or my mood, I sing along. And I only have one volume. Can you guess what it is? Basically a deafening, blood curdling scream. You would think I would have more consideration for my neighbors, but nah. I’ve got the music in me, what can I do?? I have a sneaking suspicious my neighbors have all heard me at least 39458 times and they make fun of me to their friends. The thought brings me to my knees in terror, but also….do you think they think I’m good? Like, what if they tell their friends that their neighbor is maybe a professional singer and they send recordings of my performances to them to prove my talents??? That would be neat.

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Eventually, I’m going to find a strongly worded letter in my mailbox telling me to invest in a muzzle.

 

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 4-6 cups of arugula or mixed greens
  • 1 spaghetti squash, halved + deseeded
  • 1 butternut squash, peeled + deseeded + cut into cubes
  • 1 pint of cherry tomatoes, halved
  • 1 english cucumber, sliced thin
  • 1/2 a red onion, sliced thin
  • 1/2 cup of kalamata olives, halved
  • 1/4 cup of apple cider vinegar
  • 1 tsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 tbsp. of Dijon mustard
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1/3 cup of olive oil + 2 tbsp.
  • S+P, to taste
  • Pumpkin seeds, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Arrange spaghetti squash halves on a baking sheet + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + some S+P, arrange cut side down
  • Line another baking sheet with foil + arrange butternut squash in an even layer + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + S+P
  • Bake both for 40-45 minutes, tossing butternut squash once in the middle of cooking + checking on your spaghetti squash to make sure it’s not charring
  • Once cooled, pull out the spaghetti squash noodles
  • Meanwhile, combine apple cider vinegar + garlic + Dijon + agave + remaining olive oil + S+P
  • In a bowl, combine tomatoes + cucumber + onion + olives + 1-2 tbsp. of the apple cider vinaigrette, let marinate until ready to serve
  • To serve, arrange some greens on a plate + top with spaghetti squash + butternut squash + marinated veggies + pumpkin seeds + a lil more dressing
  • Hopscotch your fork from squash to squash, getting a lil bit of everything on your utensil, then slingshot it all into your pie hole, repeat until you are full or your wrist is exhausted from slingshotting

Crispy Eggplant + Orange Salad

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Shopping is an activity I detest.

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Unless I’m with my mother and she’s paying, of course.

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But honestly moms just have this innate skill that the Lord infuses in them the moment they conceive. They can choose clothes for their daughter that said daughter would never pick out herself and they turn out to be the daughter’s very favorite clothes.

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I’m simply lost without her shopping guidance. I spent three hours shopping for a dress this weekend. Three hours of my life I could have spent doing 1.8 million other things like bingeing a show, reading a book, exploring a new hobby, learning a new language, working on my excel spreadsheet of America’s top airports, etc. I went to NO JOKE 11 stores. Everything was either a frumpy sack on me or $300. I needed Susan there to dig through the sale bins & pull out the gem among the rocks. And isn’t it the MOST typical that I was shopping v specifically for a dress, so the world conspired against me to put nothing but adorable sweaters in my path? It’s cruel and unusual!

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So, the next best thing – I made her online shop for me & ordered a dress she picked out. Boom.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 5-6 cups of arugula
  • 1 eggplant, peeled + cut into cubes
  • 1 cup of panko breadcrumbs
  • 1 tbsp. of flax meal
  • 1 cup of spinach
  • 1/4 cup of basil leaves
  • 1/2 cup of pumpkin seeds
  • 2 tbsp. of nutritional yeast
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 cup of quinoa, cooked
  • 1 orange, cut into lil pieces
  • 1/2 cup of kalamata olives, cut in half
  • 1 shallot, sliced thin
  • 1/2 cup + 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Place eggplant cubes in a colander + sprinkle with some S, coating on the lil cubes – let water release + drain for about 30 minutes
  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • In a food processor, combine spinach + 1 cup of aurugla + basil + pumpkin seeds + nutritional yeast + garlic + S+P, process on low + slowly add in 1/2 cup of olive oil until well combined, refrigerate until ready to serve
  • Add flax meal + 1/2 cup of warm water to a bowl, set aside for a few minutes + add breadcrumbs to another bowl, add red pepper + some S+P to it
  • Pat dry the eggplant cubes, then a few cubes at a time, dip into flax egg bowl + then breadcrumbs, place on a lined baking sheet
  • Bake for 35-40 minutes, tossing once in the middle of cooking
  • Meanwhile, heat remaining olive oil in a lil skillet over medium heat
  • Add shallot + S+P, cook for 4-5 minutes
  • To serve, arrange some arugula on a plate + top with eggplant + quinoa + orange + olives + shallots + pesto
  • Get a bite of every lil component on your fork + do the same for your sweetie + wrap your arms around each other like you would with champagne + then feed each other until your arms fall asleep