Soyrizo + White Bean Cassoulet

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

I love typing things into the Google machine & seeing what other humans are searching for.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

Like, I just typed “why” into Google & got several options to complete my search, ranging from “why am I so emotional” to “why you always lying.” I don’t know the answer to either of these without Google’s help, so these are valid searches.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

“How” is also a really entertaining one. I figured my altruistic generation would be searching for “how to solve world peace” or “how to help the homeless.” NOPE. “How deep is your love” & “how to tie a tie” is about as complex as we get!

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

But “who” is really giving me my kicks tonight. “Who is fancy” & “who is in jail” are just questions I NEED answers to. Like, immediately. Answers: Fancy is a man & he sings. (Who knew?) There are a lot of human beings in the jail system.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

To be fair, I think the “who is in jail” one came up for me because I was recently looking at the local court records to see if I had any frenemies get arrested over the holidays.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb. of soyrizo
  • 3 cans of cannellini beans, rinsed + drained
  • 1 onion, chopped
  • 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 pint of cherry tomatoes, rinsed
  • 1 tbsp. of rosemary
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tbsp. of balsamic vinegar
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 425 degrees
  • Heat a tbsp. of olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
  • Add soyrizo + cook for 5-6 minutes
  • Add onion + S+P, cook for another 3 minutes
  • Add garlic + S+P, cook another minute
  • In a large bowl, combine soyrizo mix + cannellini beans + cherry tomatoes + balsamic vinegar + S+P
  • Arrange in a baking dish
  • Spread a couple of rosemary sprigs throughout the dish + drizzle with olive oil
  • Bake for 25 minutes
  • Serve hot
  • Warning: it’s v difficult not to eat this entire thing by yourself so use your phone a friend for this one

Sausage + Fennel Pasta

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

I’m back – no, really, I mean it this time.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

Gallivanting all across this great country has just about taken it all out of me. Including all of my daggum dough.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

They opened a new H&M at home & my mother & I went ballistic. We were there as soon as they opened & it was one of those shopping trips where there were so many things traipsed over my arms that my twigs just about snapped off. The best feeling.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

I don’t have any shopping buddies here so getting to shop with my mom is like Christmas Eve & my 5th birthday party wrapped all in one. When I was little, I used to love carrying all of the shopping bags because I thought it made us look rich. Like, don’t tell me to consolidate said bags either. No, no, the more bags, the more wealth. & we looked like billionaires this weekend – it was so fabulous.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

& I was supes sad to leave so she bought me shoes, a skirt, some sweaters & a t-shirt with roller blades on them. Success!

 

Time: 30 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4

Ingredients:

  • 1 package of pasta
  • 1 fennel bulb, sliced thin
  • 1 cup of grape tomatoes, rinsed
  • 1 lb. of hot italian sausage
  • 1 tbsp. of butter
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • Parmesan cheese, if you so choose
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Cook pasta to al dente, drain
  • Meanwhile, heat a large skillet over medium heat
  • Add sausage + cook until done, set aside on a paper towel-lined plate
  • Add fennel + S+P to the skillet, cook for 3-4 minutes
  • Add garlic, cook another minute
  • Add tomatoes + S+P + crushed red pepper, cook until soft + starting to burst
  • Add the sausage back in + stir
  • Add butter to warm pot the pasta was cooked in
  • Add the pasta + sausage mix into the pot with S+P, combine well
  • Serve hot
  • Drown in pot of leftovers

Sausage + Peppers

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

Have I already revealed that I don’t do exercise?

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

It’s not a secret. I’m either binge watching something, cooking or sleeping. I just don’t have time to sweat. My metabolism has, thus far, been my BFF. I eat all the things I want & nothing happens. When it does happen, I stop eating Oreos & it stops happening. That’s just how it’s worked for me. I didn’t choose this life, OK?

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

As I enter into my old age, I find my skin starting to just kind of hang on my bones. My body is betraying me & I’m upset. Luckily, my husband is basically a body builder. His new hobby is something called “olympic weight lifting” – I have no idea. I’ve resisted lifting weights with him until my Women’s Health had an article telling me that it would not bulk me up & make me look I’m on roids!!! So I did it.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

It was all fine & dandy. I’m naturally good at just about everything so lifting a barbell over my head was nothing different. Except no one told me what my body would feel like two days later. The only picture I can paint is me walking around like a giant branch is up my butt. It’s just unreal. Some muscles in my legs have decided to go completely numb & stop working???? Idk. I’m over it, though.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

Just gonna stick to depriving myself of Oreos when I feel chubby.

 

 

 

Time: 30 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2

Ingredients:

  • 1.5 pounds of cajun chicken sausage, cut in chunks
  • 1 red pepper, sliced
  • 1 green pepper, sliced
  • 1 yellow pepper, sliced
  • 1 onion, sliced
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • On a bare baking sheet, arrange peppers + onions
  • Drizzle with olive oil + S+P
  • Roast in the oven for 12-14 minutes
  • Meanwhile, cook sausage in a large skillet over medium heat, browning to your liking
  • Once peppers are roasted + sausage is browned, add peppers to the skillet + combine
  • Serve hot
  • Eat this daily because it’s paleo + it’s acceptable by law