Black-Eyed Pea Salad

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Do you ever have those times in life when so much is happening at once and if you don’t laugh at all of the things going wrong you will actually crumple into a ball and completely lose your mind?

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Hi, it me.

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Ya girl has been in and out of the hospital over the last two weeks with appointments and tests and a big barrel of melodrama. All is fine but I can say with great confidence which hospital restrooms reign supreme – first floor second set on the left – and there is popcorn on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

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The off-brand maraschino cherry on top of my radical few weeks: On the way to my most recent appointment, I’m cruising along, listening to some good tuneage, daydreaming about my to-do list when BAH BOOM pot hole. I hit that thing so hard it about knocked me into a tree. I’m swerving trying to get my act together when I hear this heinous sound. I pull over just to catch my breath and look at the car. What do ya know? I successfully popped a tire! Being the modern woman I am, I have always MEANT to learn how to change my own tire, but for some reason, kept finding 8 million better things to do with my time. So there I sat. Waiting for my knight in overalls to show up in his steed of a pickup truck.

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I still can’t decide if I’m uber grateful or disappointed not one person stopped and offered to help. Am I that off putting even from afar?

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

  • 2 cups of uncooked black eyed peas (soaked overnight)
  • 1/2 red onion, diced
  • 1 red pepper, diced
  • 1 green pepper, diced
  • 1 serrano pepper, sliced thin
  • 1 cup of cherry tomatoes, halved
  • 1/4 cup of cilantro, chopped
  • 1/2 cup of flax milk (or other non-dairy milk)
  • 2 tbsp. of lemon juice
  • 1 tbsp. of apple cider vinegar
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 2 chipotles in adobo + 1 tbsp. of the adobo sauce
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 lime
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Rinse soaked beans + add to a pot
  • Fill with water + bring to a boil, cook for 25-30 minutes
  • In a large bowl, combine onion + peppers + tomatoes + cilantro + S+P, set aside
  • Meanwhile, in a food processor, combine milk + lemon juice + apple cider vinegar + agave + garlic + chipotles + adobo sauce + olive oil + cumin + a lil S+P, process until smooth + runny like a dressing
  • Drain peas + add to veggie bowl + top with dressing (or let peeps serve themselves) + squeeze lime juice over
  • Serve warm or cold, whatever your prerogative baby
  • Use mouth as vacuum to suck all of this up

 

Chilled Corn Soup

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Were you all aware that I look absolutely adorable driving a sports car?

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I’m not tooting my own (car) horn or anything (get it?), but I think it’s true. It might have something to do with the tinted windows and the fact you can’t tell who is actually driving, but I digress.

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For the last week, I’ve been driving around my dad’s 2017 electric blue Mustang GT California Special.

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I know what you’re thinking, “EWW mustangs are gross!” Under normal circumstances, I totally agree, but you haven’t seen me behind the wheel of one! I fit like a glove! Also, my dad has this terribly obnoxious kit on the car that makes it sound like you’re driving a jet down the road, it’s so fetch. I just felt alive! Like, I can go so fast and it is so loud and everyone turns to look at me and is like umm how did an idiot like you afford this car and I just smile with all of my teeth and give them a big thumbs up.

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But like it’s an actual boat and ya girl had some slight difficulty in the parking department.

 

 

Time: 2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

  • 4 ears of corn, shucked + save the cobs
  • 1 medium white onion, diced
  • 1 tbsp. of fresh ginger, diced
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 jalapeno, diced
  • 1 white potato, diced
  • 1 can of coconut milk
  • Juice of 1 lime
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1 tsp. of turmeric
  • S+P, to taste
  • Cilantro, for serving
  • Sriracha, for serving

How to:

  • In a large stock pot, heat olive oil over medium heat
  • Add onion + S+P, cook 3-4 minutes
  • Add ginger + garlic, cook another minute
  • Add jalapeno, cook another 2-3 minutes
  • Add corn kernels + potato + coconut milk + 1 cup of milk + turmeric + S+P, stir to coat
  • Add corn cobs, bring to a boil, reduce heat + simmer for 25-30 minutes
  • Remove corn cobs
  • Turn off heat + stir in lime juice
  • Using an immersion, blend soup until smooth
  • Taste + add some more S+P, if you’d like
  • Put in the fridge for a couple of hourse
  • Serve cold with cilantro + some sriracha if you like a lil heat
  • Pour some soup into a glass + serve to sweetie + tell him it’s a banana smoothie

 

Adapted from here!

Sweet + Sour Pineapple + Peppers

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This is probably going to be my last post.

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Because my husband has spent all of our money and we cannot afford to pay the internet bill anymore.

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Like, I throw the man a bone and he wants the whole steak. (This is a metaphor I just made up, I hope it makes sense.)

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The human I married has been pestering me for actual years about investing in equipment for a home gym. I’m not talking a treadmill in the den, people. I’m talking, take everything out of the garage and fill it with barbells and bikes and rowing machines and something called a squat rack, I don’t even know. I’ve been incredibly against this for a couple of valid reasons: 1) the expense is thousands of dollars – mama likes to have nice things, too. 2) I don’t think parking in my own garage is really too much to ask 3) the sound of a barbell dropping on concrete sends me into full-blown panic & I convince myself the foundation is cracking & we are going to get sucked into a sink hole.

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I caved after he looked at me all lovingly and whispered, “If I have a home gym, I get to be home with you more, babe……….”

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 pineapple, cut in chunks
  • 1 red bell pepper, cut in chunks
  • 1 yellow bell pepper, cut in chunks
  • 1 orange bell pepper, cut in chunks
  • 1 tbsp. of ketchup
  • 1 tbsp. of soy sauce
  • 2 tbsp. of rice vinegar
  • 4 tbsp. of agave
  • 2 tsp. of cornstarch
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 1/2 cup of raw cashews, toasted
  • Brown rice for serving,
  • 2 green onions, diced
  • 1/4 cup of cilantro, chopped
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 350 degrees
  • Arrange pineapple + peppers on a lined baking sheet
  • Drizzle with olive oil + S+P
  • Bake for 15 minutes, toss, bake another 15 minutes
  • Meanwhile, in a bowl, combine ketchup + soy sauce + rice vinegar + agave
  • Combine 1/3 cup of water + cornstarch, stir until cornstarch dissolves
  • Add cornstarchy water to ketchup mix
  • Add to saucepan, bring to a boil, turn down + simmer for 6-8 minutes or until thick + sticky, but drippy
  • In a bowl, combine sauce + roasted peppers + pineapple
  • Serve over brown rice with green onions + cilantro
  • With hands, scoop mix + throw at blank wall, finger paint to create art

 

Sauce from here!