Summer Fritters


Apparently, I’m going to have to take over ALL of the household chores.


I give the man such simple tasks. He does outside, I do inside. Meaning, he has to keep a pair of cars clean and the garage tidy. That’s it!


Living in a townhouse, we have peeps that do our yard, so like the man’s chore time is truly minimal. Living in a townhouse also means we have communal trash receptacles. His most important job is to simply take the trash to said receptacles. Simple, right?


We didn’t drive my car during the entire hurricane because it’s basically a Tonka truck and might get swept away in heavy winds. After the storm, I hop in to run some errands. I’m instantly hit what a stench reminiscent of putrid animal flesh. I look all around this car and find nothing. I pump up the air, roll down the windows and continue on my journey, gagging constantly. At one point, I convinced myself the animal was actually still alive and going to crawl on me any second and, while I don’t eat animals, I also don’t love being near them. By the time I get home, I’m thoroughly disturbed. “GARRETT! GARRETT! Something has died in my car!!!!!!” He goes to check it out and comes back in with these sad puppy dog eyes. “I did something bad………….I left a bag of trash in your trunk….for probably a week.”


BEST BELIEVE your girl will not be letting this one go for a minimum of 13 weeks!


Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 8-10 fritters


  • 1 can of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
  • 2 corn on the cob, grilled or roasted + shucked, or 1 can of roasted corn, drained
  • 1 zucchini, shredded with a cheese grater
  • 1/2 a white onion, diced
  • 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 2 tbsp. of nutritional yeast
  • 1/4 cup of flax meal
  • 1/2 cup of whole wheat flour
  • 1 tsp. of cumin
  • 1 tsp. of paprika
  • 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste
  • 2-3 tbsp. of olive oil

How to:

  • In a bowl, mash the chickpeas
  • Add all other ingredients minus the olive oil, mix well
  • Refrigerate about 20 minutes or so
  • Heat olive oil over medium heat in a cast iron skillet
  • Form lil patties + cook no more than 4 at a time for about 2-3 minutes on each side
  • Remove + repeat with remaining patties
  • Serve hot with some sprouts + a lil salad
  • When feeling angry at your sweetie, use a lil fritter as a punching bag + eat the crumblies off your knuckles

Zoodle Stir Fry


I wish I were great at something.


I mean, I’m decent at, like, everything, but I’m not really great at anything.


I’ve dabbled in a lot of activities, but I don’t know if I’ve ever found my *thing*.


I’m not very good at singing, I kind of do that throaty thing you’re not supposed to do. I was pretty good at acting, I think, but it seems I’ve developed acute stage fright over the years so no go. I enjoy writing, but am not sure what a subordinate clause is so I don’t think that’s going anywhere. I’m really loving yoga these days, but cannot get that daggum crow pose down! I was exceptionally terrible at dance, but I blame it on the lack of toes (explanation saved for another post). I suppose I’m destined for mediocracy.


Honestly, my parents shouldn’t have let me quit the violin in the 1st grade. That was probably my calling.


Time: 40 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4


  • 4 zucchini, peeled + zoodled with a spiralizer
  • 1 cup of snap peas
  • 1 can of water chestnuts, drained
  • 1 can of baby corn, drained
  • 1/2 cup of peanut butter
  • 1/3 cup of sesame oil + 1 tbsp for cooking
  • 1/2 cup of soy sauce
  • 1/4 cup of rice vinegar
  • 2 tbsp. of gochujang hot pepper paste
  • 1 tbsp. of garlic, minced
  • 1 tbsp. of fresh ginger, peeled + minced
  • Cilantro, for serving

How to:

  • In a bowl, whisk peanut butter + 1/3 cup of sesame oil + 1/3 cup of soy sauce + rice vinegar + gochujang + garlic + ginger in a bowl, refrigerate
  • Meanwhile arrange zoodles on paper towels + cover with more paper towels, getting a lil of the water out
  • In a wok, heat the remaining sesame oil over medium heat
  • Add snap peas + water chestnuts + baby corn, stir fry for 2-3 minutes until they start to brown + get crisp
  • Add remaining soy sauce, cook another 2 minutes
  • Add a tbsp of the sauce you made earlier, cook another minute
  • Add zoodles to a bowl + top with veggies + cilantro
  • Just before serving, add a lil more of your sauce to your zoodle stir fry + combine (this keeps the zoodles crisp!)
  • Fashion zoodles into wig +  place it atop your head + ask your sweetie if you’re pretty



Sauce idea from right here!

Vegan Zucchini Lasagna

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I am getting too adventurous for my own good.

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This weekend, I stayed in an AirBNB………………..while the owners were home. *GASP*

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Garr & I went to Portland for the weekend. I put him in charge of finding our shelter. When will I learn?

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He finds this place. He’s really jazzed. Shows me pix & is all, “It’s only like $90!” My only request when partaking in this archaic form of overnight stay is to have the place to myself. I do not want to run into Mrs. Gladstone as I’m headed to tinkle. Not happening. He’s all, “Yeah, we definitely have the place to ourselves.” Please take a guess as to whether he was correct.

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Did I mention it was a basement?



P.S. The owners were the sweetest people ever & the basement apartment was super chic and remodeled. 5 stars. I am a drama queen for the sake of drama. Love me.




Time: 2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 4


  • 4-5 zucchini squash, sliced in thin ribbons
  • 1 jar of your favie marinara sauce
  • 3 cups of raw almonds
  • 2-3 tbsp. of nutritional yeast
  • 1/2 cup of fresh basil, plus more for serving
  • 1 tsp. of dried oregano
  • 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • Juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • 1/4 cup of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Soak almonds in very hot water for one hour, drain
  • Preheat oven to 375 degrees
  • In a food processor, pulse almonds until very fine
  • Add nutritional yeast + basil + oregano + crushed red pepper + lemon juice + S+P
  • Process on low + add in olive oil
  • Process until well combined
  • Pour some marinara in the bottom of a baking dish
  • Add a layer of zucchini noodles
  • Spread some of the almond cheese – it’s not super spready so I crumbled + flattened it!
  • Repeat until all zucchini is used
  • Cover + bake for 45 minutes
  • Remove cover + bake another 15 minutes
  • Serve hot with fresh basil or parsley
  • Scoop up handful + rub generously on face + let the almond crumble exfoliate your pores



Adapted from here!