Brussels + Chickpea Salad

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Why have I been doing my own grocery shopping all these years?

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When there are people you can pay to literally do it for you????

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I’ve been v resistant to the instant cart/click list whatever your grocery store calls their grocery shopping service life.

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I am one of those freaks who LIKES grocery shopping. I like creating my list and picking out all of my things myself. A simple pleasure. Which has been stripped from me since COVID! I truly haven’t stepped foot in a grocery store since March. Been v blessed to order Garr around to do my bidding. But we decided to try something different last week and order our groceries online and just pick them up curbside. Umm…absolute GAME CHANGER. I have seen the light! Now, I do need to offer my training skills for how to pick out avocados to last a full week. And the art of digging around the spinach boxes for the best possible expiration date.

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But baby steps, people.

 

 

Time: 45 minutes (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2-3

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb. of brussels sprouts, roughly chopped
  • 1 can of chickpeas, rinsed + drained
  • 1/4 cup of walnuts, chopped
  • 1/4 cup of pickled red onions, sliced
  • 1/2 cup of dried cranberries
  • 1/4 cup + 2 tbsp. of olive oil
  • 2 tbsp. of apple cider vinegar
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1 tbsp. of Dijon mustard
  • S+P, to taste

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400
  • Arrange brussels on a lined baking sheet + chickpeas on another
  • Drizzle each with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + S+P
  • Bake for 20-25 minutes, tossing once in the middle of cooking until roasted to your desire
  • Meanwhile, combine remaining olive oil + apple cider vinegar + agave + Dijon mustard + S+P
  • To serve, combine brussels + chickpeas + walnuts + onion + cranberries + dressing
  • Serve warm
  • Swan dive into the bowl + doggy paddle your way out with your mouth

 

Sweet + Spicy Brussels Sprouts Tacos

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I just feel really seen.

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Like, the people I surround myself with really just get me and accept me for who I am.

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As confirmed at my BFF Christmas party during our traditional round of Secret Santa when I opened the most Rachel gift I ever could have dreamed of.

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A hot pink karaoke microphone. Bazinga! Now that’s a thoughtful gift, I tell you. I’m not sure how I made it 27 years without one already. It’s just so daggum handy. We were watching music videos all evening and I was able to sing into my new microphone at a higher volume than my peers thereby drowning out their voices and letting me hear myself better. It obviously has bluetooth so I can play music through it and sing along to my favorite artists or, as intended, to instrumental versions of hits so I can really shine. For some reason, I don’t sound as good on Rehab when dueting with Amy Winehouse. It was also really useful on Christmas Eve when my family played this game where you had to say stupid phrases in equally stupid accents. The echo effect on the mic proved most helpful.

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If your Christmas was half as pleasant as mine, you, my friend, are a lucky lil kitten.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb. of brussels sprouts, ends trimmed + brussels halved
  • 1/2 red onion, diced
  • 1/2 small red cabbage, sliced thin
  • 1 can of vegan refried beans
  • Juice of 1 lime
  • 2 tbsp. of hot sauce
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1 tbsp. of olive oil
  • S+P, to taste
  • Tortillas, for serving
  • Cilantro, for serving
  • Avocado, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Arrange brussels sprouts on a lined baking sheet
  • Drizzle with olive oil + hot sauce + some S+P
  • Roast 15 minutes, remove + drizzle with agave, roast another 10-15 until crisp to your desire, remove
  • Meanwhile, heat beans in a lil pot
  • To serve, spread a couple of warm tortillas with some refried beans + fill with brussels sprouts + red onion + cabbage + top with cilantro + avocado + drizzle with lime juice
  • Form taco boat with hand + sail these bad boys straight into hole in your face

Barley + Brussels Bowls

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I don’t consider myself super vain.

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Just, like, a normal amount of vain.

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So this afternoon, when I discovered a glistening gray hair atop my head, my meltdown was only like an 8/10.

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I’m only 27, I have barely even lived! I simply don’t have the required wisdom to rock the salt and pepper look. I only recently came to grips with the mousy brown ‘do I’ve sported my entire life, it’s too soon for a change! I’m always in awe of women who rock their gray – they are always so gorgeous and confident and I idealize them. I want to be them one day. That day is just not today. I’m also not really interested in dying my hair. Can I dye a single strand? It legit looks like a silver Christmas tassle dangling from my noggin. I just don’t know what could have caused this. My diet and exercise haven’t changed and I have been in a perpetual state of crippling anxiety for 10 years now, so I can’t blame it on an increase in stress. Perhaps it’s time I come to grips with my mortality and embrace my old age.

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Specifically, I look most forward to finally receiving the early bird specials at my favorite chain restaurants.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 3-4

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup of barley
  • 1 lb. of brussels sprouts, trimmed + halved
  • 1 honey crisp apple, peeled + cut in small chunks
  • 2 shallots, sliced thin
  • 1 cup of edamame, cooked
  • 1/4 cup of pumpkin seeds, toasted
  • 1/4 cup of dried cranberries
  • 1 tbsp. of agave
  • 1 tsp. of smoked paprika
  • 1/4 cup of balsamic vinegar
  • S+P, to taste
  • 2 tbsp. of olive oil

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Cook barley according to package directions
  • Arrange brussels sprouts on a lined baking sheet + drizzle with 1 tbsp. of olive oil + sprinkle with S+P, bake for 15 minutes, remove from oven, toss with agave + bake another 10 minutes
  • Arrange apple + shallots on another lined baking sheet + drizzle with remaining olive oil + smoked paprika + S+P, bake 15 minutes, tossing once in the middle
  • Meanwhile, reduce vinegar in a lil sauce pan
  • To serve, combine barley + brussels + apples + shallots + edamame + pumpkin seeds + cranberries + stir with balsamic vinegar
  • Serve warm or room temp
  • Put baggiest sweater on + swaddle self in scarf, pour mug of hot tea + sit by a roaring fire with your sweetie, tossing brussels into one another’s pie holes