PB + Chocolate Chip Skillet

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Give me a mic, put me in front of athletes & roll the camera.

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Because I am ready to become a sports reporter.

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I’m not sure why it’s taken me 28 long years to discover my destiny.

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Prob because I didn’t like sports until I was 25 and even then I only learned the rules like last year, but that’s neither here nor there. I went to my first NHL game this weekend. Am now a BIG hockey guy. It’s quick, it’s violent, I dig it. I just love the camaraderie at sporting events. All the strangers drinking overpriced brewskis and shouting at the top of their lungs, hoping for the same outcome. I love giving out high fives all willy nilly and becoming fast friends with the bros next to me. America, man. I think I could really provide some colorful commentary to stale ESPN and the like. All their anchors know too much, like rules and player names.  It’ll be less analyzing plays and more analyzing athlete moods and crowd energy  – the important stuff.

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Oh, and I’ll pack lil vegan treats for everyone to snack on in between plays!

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + baking) | Serves: 6-8

Ingredients:

  • 1 1/4 cup of whole wheat flour
  • 1 tsp. of baking soda
  • Pinch of S
  • 1/2 cup of vegan butter, softened
  • 1/2 cup of pure cane sugar
  • 1/2 cup of brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup of creamy PB
  • 1 tbsp. of flax meal
  • 2 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 3/4 cup of vegan chocolate chips

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 350
  • Grease a skillet with cooking spray
  • In a tiny bowl, combine flax with 3 tbsp. of warm water, mix + set aside
  • In a bowl, whisk flour + baking soda + S, set aside
  • In a mixer bowl, combine butter + sugars + PB, beat for two minutes on medium
  • Add in flax egg + vanilla extract, mix on high for a minute to get all that good good combined
  • Turn mixer on low + slowly add in dry ingredients a lil at a time until all combined
  • Turn off mixer + fold in chocolate chips
  • Spread cookie dough + pat down evenly in skillet
  • Bake 25 minutes, remove + let cool (it’ll cook more in the warm AF skillet!)
  • Cut + serve warm
  • Let it sit out on your counter + nibble on it every time you walk by + see if you can beat our household record of devouring in 5 hours

 

Adapted from here!

Chocolate + Date Oat Bars

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I am a 19 year old frat boy.

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In that I have been living like a stuffed pig this week.

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Garr was traveling this week and I was bound and determined to get the house spic and span after several weeks of both of us traveling.

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The laundry basket overflowing with three clean loads I’ve yet to fold tell a different story. I literally just dug through it to get some clean workout clothes for yoga tomorrow. I am ashamed of myself. Yet here I sit. Writing this. Instead of doing my chores. The irony. I was also going to clean all the bathrooms. I managed to put my hairbrush under the sink and contact solution in the drawer. The end. I also had big plans to sweep & mop on my lunch break. Did I instead read The Bachelorette spoilers? You better believe it. I even only ran Felix (roomba) once in 4 days. That is literally unacceptable! He’s used to a daily workout. I’ve reached a new level of lazy if I cannot *press* his button. I’m blaming it on the full moon. It’s sucking my energy for its weird lunar purposes.

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I have at least showered every day and for that I applaud myself.

 

Time: 2 hours (prep + cooking) | Serves: 12 bars

Ingredients:

  • 2 cups of whole wheat flour
  • 1 cup of rolled oats
  • 1/2 cup of granulated sugar
  • Pinch of S
  • 1/2 cup of vegan butter, melted
  • 12 oz. of pitted dates
  • 1 tsp. of vanilla extract
  • 1 cup of vegan semisweet chocolate chips

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 350 degrees
  • Coat a 9×13 baking dish with cooking spray + top with a sheet of parchment paper
  • Meanwhile, combine flour + oats + sugar + S
  • Slowly stir in melted butter until combined
  • Scoop 2/3 of the mix into the bottom of the baking dish + pat into a flat layer
  • Pop in the freezer while you make the filling
  • In a food processor, combine dates + vanilla + pinch of S + 1/2 cup of hot water + process on high until smooth
  • Transfer to a bowl + fold in chocolate chips
  • Spread date mix on top of the oat base
  • Top with leftover oat mix + pat down
  • Bake for 40 minutes or until golden brown
  • Let cool for an hour + pop in the freezer for a bit to set
  • Cut into bars + serve! Or individually wrap them + pop back in the freezer for snacking throughout the week
  • Fasten on your bib, partner, there are going to be some serious crumbs

 

Adapted from here!

Eggplant Parm Pizza

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I am a zombie.

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I am walking around with glazed over eyeballs, ragged breaths and outstretched arms looking for my next victim.

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By victim, I mean plush object to cuddle and nap with for 23 hours.

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I just returned home from a long work conference where I had, on average, 4 hours of sleep each night. I am fully grown adult who needs at LEAST eight hours of beauty rest to even look and act like a human being. Nine is preferable – I find the extra hour adds just the faintest glow to my complexion. By the end of the week, I was struggling to form sentences and conceal the bags under my eyes. At one point, I was going down an escalator and saw some folks I needed to connect with coming up & I proceeded to practically bark at them….but also stutter?? Like, I tried to get my point across, but the combination of no sleep and the moving staircase I was on made it tricky. Another time, I found myself riding the escalator up, only to ride it back down immediately because I forgot something, and then do it all over again. The passersby found it amusing at least. I came home and fell asleep during yoga, so really doing well on fitness goals, too.

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Now why did I think it was a good idea to plan a vacation immediately after this requiring me to get up at 3:00am for a flight????

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 2 pizzas

Ingredients:

  • 2 cauliflower crusts
  • 1 eggplant, peeled + sliced in 1/4 inch thick discs
  • 1 cup of tomato sauce
  • 1/2 cup of raw cashews, soaked overnight
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • 2 tbsp. of unsweetened almond milk
  • 1/2 of a block of firm tofu, water drained
  • 1 tbsp. of ground flax seeds
  • 1/2 tbsp. of all-purpose flour
  • 1 cup of panko
  • 1 tsp. of italian seasoning
  • 1 tsp. of oregano
  • 1/2 tsp. of crushed red pepper
  • S+P, to taste
  • Olive oil spray
  • Basil, for serving

How to:

  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees
  • Place eggplant rounds in a colander + sprinkle with salt, let drain for 20-30 minutes
  • Meanwhile, pulse cashews in food processor
  • Add lemon juice + tofu + S+P, process on high + slowly add in milk until smooth
  • Adjust seasoning to taste and place in fridge until ready to use
  • Meanwhile, combine flax seeds + 1/3 cup of water in a bowl, set aside for 10 minutes
  • Add panko + Italian seasoning + oregano + crushed red pepper + S+P to another bowl
  • Dredge eggplant disc in flax egg, then panko, place on a sprayed lined baking sheet, repeat with remaining dics
  • Bake 30 minutes, flipping once in the middle of cooking
  • Spread the crusts with tomato sauce + top with eggplant slices + tofu ricotta
  • Bake another 10 minutes
  • Serve warm with basil
  • Fold a slice like a lil pizza boat + swim it right down your cavernous gullet

 

Adapted from here!