There’s a reason I didn’t go into the medical field.

You might guess it’s because of the blood or guts or puke or just bodily functions in general.

Those don’t really bother me tbh. I’m just a big, fat spaz.

Due to some stellar medical issues, I have to take these shots. I was in the doctor’s office yesterday and my nurse showed me how to do my new shot and then asked me to demonstrate so she knew I wasn’t an idiot. My how she overestimated me. Not only am I an idiot, I am a dangerous idiot. I put the shot together just fine. I was taking it apart and putting the little plastic piece back on the needle when somehow the needle went sideways through the plastic and into my finger. It bled. I let out a minor profanity. My nurse was like, “Huh OK I have truly never seen that before.”

What can I say, I like being the first at things.

 

 

Time: 1 hour (prep + cooking) | Serves: 7-8 dolmas

Ingredients:

• 1 bunch of lacinato kale leaves
• 1 onion, chopped
• 2 tbsp. of garlic, minced
• 1 package of tempeh, crumbled
• 2 cups of brown rice, cooked
• 1/4 cup of fresh dill
• 2 tbsp. of parsley, chopped
• 1 tbsp. of olive oil
• 1/2 cup of vegan, plain yogurt
• Juice of 1 lemon
• S+P, to taste

How to:

• Bring a pot of salted water to a boil
• Add kale leaves a few at a time, cooking for 3-4 minutes
• Remove + place on a kitchen towel + pat dry
• In a bowl, combine yogurt + lemon juice + some S+P, set aside
• Meanwhile, heat olive oil in a skillet over medium heat
• Add onion + S+P, cook for 3-4 minutes
• Add garlic, cook another minute
• Add tempeh, cook 6-7 minutes or until starting to brown
• Add rice + parsley + dill + S+P, cook another 1-2 minutes
• Turn off heat, add half of the yogurt mix
• Place a kale leaf on a flat surface
• Fill with a hefty scoop of the rice mix right in the middle
• Fold like a hamburger first, then a hotdog (you know what I’m talking about), place seam side down on a plate
• Serve with remaining yogurt sauce
• Accidentally eat all of them in one sitting + watch your tummy balloon from all of the delectable rice kernels

 

Adapted from here!